I am a kitty named Jellybean; how nice to meet you! I haven’t yet composed my official autobiography, so here are a few essential tidbits about me: I’m a distinguished kitty gentleman, a renaissance kitty if you will, living at Kittybottom Garden on Pottytock Drive. I have three ridiculous brothers: Braesnut, Scampers, and Sneakers, each of whom I plan to purrder in some dramatic fashion.
One of my favorite pastimes is composing lengthy letters to my penpal, Fluffystuff. Fluffystuff is a cultured kitty living in an idyllic cottage in Shropshire, where he tends a prestigious rose and catnip garden. You might have noticed that I post those letters on this site for the benefit of your reading pleasure and edification (one must never cease to edify oneself, I like to say!)
My hobbies and interests are so numerous that I can’t possibly list them all, so I will only list those about which I am most passionate: wearing shorts, oil painting, studying the French language, solving mysteries, exercising at Jazzercats, and introducing my girlfriend Cordelia to fine dining (we’ve visited Long John Silver’s several times this week!)
I must admit that I do not maintain this diary all on my own; oh no! I am much too busy. In my employ are two morons, Kitten and Dampers, and they do much of the work around here (sub-par as it is.) If you have any complaints, please let them know, not me!